^_^ like this, your writting flows nicely. Its nice how you add in a bit of description to, it makes your writting very colorful, and smooth. I really do hope you continue, this is nice, and very cute!! I like the way you make them all in character, but at the same time they seem more mature, or have a more mature range of emotions, i guess you could say. Good job, really ^_^ ~Anvanimaserke ps, I have a fic posted up here to, it would mean alot to me if you read and reviewed at, although of course you dont have to...

Not bad for a start :) Looking forward to seeing how this one goes