now if you dont know me personally(it is a small world)then you wouldnt know how angry for there not being another chapter (yes i am as impaitent as Sonic The Hedgehog) but keep the great work or ill E-execute you (muahahaha) anyway i have absolutly no clue as to what will happen in the next.
you seem to know your stuff in the military just like my brother did even though he wasnt in for long because he was kicked out for being sick too long. dont let that happen to you.
Author's Response: Trust me the amount of e-mails that I get on a daily basis confirms your accusation that I didn't update for at least half a month this time. This is mainly due to the fact that I have had to re-write the new chapter 4 TIMES NOW!!!! God I hate writer's block. However I have actually gotten somewhat around that and am in the process of actually (this is another thing that people have been emailing me about for the past month) putting up a real sonadow filled chapter. Oh and the whole thing about the military..... If you haven't noticed on my profile in the forum.... I am in the military ^_^.
Hehe, that was so cute...and great. Mmm...sexy.
>.> -licks and runs-
Author's Response: Like I said I had to do something evil and have sonadow in this chapter. Although I'm rather glad you enjoyed it.
Heheh, that's awesome. Great job on the new chapter!
Author's Response: Aye thank you... Trust me though your going to like the next chapter. I already have part of it and now that I have new evil Ideas (Sonadow parts included, since you all keep bugging me about it so much. ^_^) I intend to have fun with the next one... STAY TUNED WHEN SONIC AND SH.... Oh wait almost screwed that up for myself =3
VERY NICE! Aww, Sonic's the only one who was ever kind to him. I wonder what his true feelings are. Love? Obssesion? I'd like to think love. As always, amazing chapter. I like the enw style - it really rubs in the torture he's in. Well done!
Author's Response: It's what I was sort of going for. As for the new style of writing in this chapter... It just had to be done. If I tried to do something like I did in the earlier chapters than I would have a piece of crap. This was originally called "Permanent Contract" but after thinking about it and changing the style of the sotry I figured "Breaking the Mind" sounded much more evil and sinister in bringing out some sort of torture quality. I thank you for the Review. Much Appreciated. ^_^
Author's Response: It's what I was sort of going for. As for the new style of writing in this chapter... It just had to be done. If I tried to do something like I did in the earlier chapters than I would have a piece of crap. This was originally called "Permanent Contract" but after thinking about it and changing the style of the sotry I figured "Breaking the Mind" sounded much more evil and sinister in bringing out some sort of torture quality. I thank you for the Review. Much Appreciated. ^_^
Wow. Just...wow. This is an incredible fic and I love the content, the way its been written, the characteristaion - and how Sonic seems to be full of surprises in this one. I can't wait for the next update. *bounces on seat, falls off*
Author's Response: Quite honestly I didn't know how people would take "Lies and Deceit," but apparently my first impression of the chapter was wrong. Im glad that at least one person is pleased with what I am writing so far. I can tell you this much that if my next chapter plays out on paper like I have it played out in my head right now (Somewhat evil stare... haha) than it should be just as good if not better than Chapter 1. As for the suprises part... well I hadn't actually planned anything for "Lies and Deceit," Yet it seems I put something in there anyway. Much Appreciated :)
Aw, it's really great you're going to continue! This story is a little cliche and cheesy, (the part where Shadow was all "WHY COULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN ME," for example) but that's the only real problem I've had. The cliffhanger at the end really had me thinking, "Are they going to somehow live or will this story take place in death?" since I couldn't find an indication as to what. Being able to keep things in the Shadows (epic pun I pulled there. :D) is a quality that every good writer should have, and it's a breath of fresh air. I usually can figure out what's going to happen in the next chapter of anything due to blunt foreshadowing, but that gets old after a while.
Overall, I like the mysterious vibe I get from it, but I would cut back a smidgen on the cliche.
Author's Response: I appreciate the feedback and I know it does sound a little bit cliche on the Why couldn't have been me part. Still though the fact that just the beginning is stumping people already has me pleased and I'm glad for all of those who enjoyed this story so far. As I said before mystery books are a favorite of mine. As for the part of "Are they going to live or will this story take place in death?" Well I already have that planned out and I'm hoping that people will be blown away when I get to the final chapter.
This is actually very interesting, and with your intent to continue it, I would love to see how this would turn out! Your writing is very well done, and everything was explained and executed well.
Author's Response: Well if anyone reads these reviews other than myself I can tell you this much I have pretty much every intention to write this one out till the end. And trust me I know how this ends up but getting there is going to be a long road with the plot twists and turns. I no not one single person here will depict whats going to happen, who that blasted target is or what happens to the many other characters in this story.
Your writing appears to be a developing case. Still, I can see this narration turning into a very interesting one with the right tweaks. You definitely have the makings for some great stuff.
One thing I would suggest is some more editing. You had some simple spelling errors that you probably would have caught if you edited more closely, and remember that numbers under twenty are written out. Your narration seems a tad bit stiff, too. A little more thought input from the first person narrator would add some spice and make the reader eager for some more opinions. (You can also really warp situations in first person. Don't forget that.)
But I did like quite a good amount of it. I wonder who the target is--you played that mystery card well. And I really like your characterization of Amy. You handled her in a very mature fashion. The plot itself sounds very thrilling as well. You have a great story planned ahead. Keep up the good work. I can't wait to see more. ^^
Author's Response: I'm pleased. that someone got something out of it. Yes I know that my depiction in the first person isn't hat you could call the greatest, but after seeing what other people have been doing it gave me a few ideas :). As for the mystery part I like to read alot of them and its given me way too many ideas as to how my stories turn out. Who knows what happens in the next chapter? Well I don't know thats for sure. However I will take a closer look and see what I can do to fix what errors I missed. Much Appreciated. :P
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